If Elliott & E.T. Had Strava

Nearly 40 years ago, Elliott and E.T. gave the Feds the slip on the Best. Bike. Ride. Ever.

They didn't have Strava in 1982, but what if they did? Their ride report would probably look something like this ...

Revisit their iconic BMX chase at YouTube or in the embed below:

I’d be remiss if I didn’t thank the estimable Jason Borum for helping fine-tune both the design and the Easter Eggs worked into the copy.

The View From The End Of The Highest Paved Road In Oregon ...

... does not disappoint.

I burned some of my PTO accrued from the last year on a road trip to the state's crown jewel, Crater Lake National Park, late last month for some overdue rest and relaxation.

While the road that runs along the rim of the lake is only 32-ish miles, its rollercoaster-like elevation profile presents a formidable challenge — and serves up some stunning views.

At the southeastern corner of the park is a spur that branches off the primary road and winds its way to the Cloudcap Overlook (~7800 feet), where I paused for a moment to document this stunning scene.

The climb wasn't easy, but it was 100% worth it! You can read more — much, much more — about my route at BikeTiresDirect.

xoxo

No Sleep Till Pacific City!

With spring nearly upon us, one of my favorite events, Reach The Beach, looms on the horizon.

On Saturday, May 18, I’ll be pedaling my trusty steed from Portland (well, ok, Beaverton) to Pacific City, a popular getaway on the Oregon coast.

Organized by the American Lung Association, the single-day, 104-mile ride snakes south through wine country and a series of sleepy towns before emerging on the far side of the Siuslaw National Forest.

A staple of Oregon’s cycling calendar, the annual event is capped at 2800 riders, each of whom are asked to raise a minimum of $150, with proceeds earmarked for clean air initiatives and advocacy efforts.

This will be my third year participating and I'm dedicating it to my paternal grandfather, Donald, who passed in 1986 from throat cancer.

Between 2017 and 2018, I helped raised more than $4,000, a figure I hope to top this year (that’s your cue to throw heaps of cash at my profile page).

To help increase the size of my charitable footprint, I’ve roped friends, both old and new, into joining me and naturally, I’m excited to see how we do as a squad.

To learn more about why I’m passionate about this cause, click through to the following interview I conducted last year with the ride’s orgs and social media team.

Embedded below: Video of me going under the inflatable finish arch in 2018 and photos snapped from my handlebars the year prior.

All The News That's Fit To Film

Ring the novelty Twitter account alarm because I have a novelty Twitter account to share.

Allow me to introduce @movieheds, which aggregates headlines ripped from the reel word. Some might call them #fakenews, but I just really like prop newspapers.

While the feed's audience is still relatively modest, at least a couple of the early tweets have stirred some feels on the microblogging platform.

This one from Ghostbusters is v. iconic.

As is this one from another 80s fave, The Goonies.

Last but not least is this gem from Batman Returns, which remains a personal favorite (don't @ me).

For now, the goal is to publish one or two entries — using high-quality screengrabs and GIFs — per day. Feel free to follow along or share with the newspaper nerds in your life!

UPDATE: It seems that others off the Twitter platform like it too! The pop culture obsessives at The A.V. Club had very kind words ("Someone is collecting fake newspaper headlines from movies"), as did Laughing Squid, TVOverMind, and, ahem, men's lifestyle site, The Chive. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

The project also piqued the interest of Andy Bechtel, a professor of journalism at the University of North Carolina, who afforded me the opportunity to go deeper in a Q&A at his blog, The Editor's Desk.

xoxo

BREAKING MEWS: First Caturday Was Really Really Really Fun

Met some cool kittos last weekend at this month's First Caturday, where, by my count, about ~35 felines and 200+ humans came together for a fun, friendly meet up in Portland's Laurelhurst Park.

I'll have more to say about the event in a forthcoming piece for Cuteness [dot] com, but until then, enjoy the snaps ...

Traffic Is My Drug

Sometimes I make stuff for the internet. And sometimes that stuff finds an audience on Twitter. Collected below then: a sampling of tweets where said content has surfaced.

traffic-is-my-drug-hero-img

He's best known as the former "chief evangelist of Apple", which has to count for something.

Pouring one out for the video stores no longer with us. 😢

I'm the kind of writer you can take home to meet the brands.

High praise, amirite?

Like I said, the brands LOVE me.

Still one of my better headlines, tbh.

When Netflix wants to chill with your content.

Another holiday, another adorable cat video…

I've been this penguin, you've been this penguin, we've all been this penguin.

SHUT UP AND TAKE MY QUARTERS!

And the Oscar for Best Tweet goes to...

A sweet plug from one of BuzzFeed's star reporters.

More link love from the brands, in this case a leading publisher.

"Typically relegated to sidekick status (or worse) on the big screen, the humble rabbit takes center stage here in this new supercut..."

So cute you'll be puking rainbows.

"This band's my favorite man, don't ya love 'em?"

I stand by my original prediction!

Probably the nicest thing anyone has ever written about my videos.

I'm not even sure what this says. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Grumpy Cat tweeted about my work once. It was awful.

This megalist later got retweeted by the man himself.</humblebrag>

Kind words from a then-editor with BuzzFeed's Community vertical. She later went on to break the now infamous "Dress" that put the internet in a tizzy.

Why? Why not?

Poor little guy :(

When you get signal boosted by the Social Media Coordinator for the Golden State Warriors.

RESPECT 🙏 🙏 🙏

All my best tips and tricks edited into listicle form. 

Is there anything Chris Pratt can't do?

One of BuzzFeed's resident thought leaders thought-leadering.

When your work is translated into French...

...and Spanish.

"Sweat-drenched garments have ... played an important role in movie history, as demonstrated by 'Leisure On The Lens: Tracksuits In The Movies,' a new supercut by Travis Greenwood and Robert Jones."

A fun video that got picked up by one of Twitter's best film feeds.

My most successful and enduring post for The Dodo was this list spun around rabbits. More than three years after publication, it remains a staple in their social rotation.

With more than 14 million-plus followers, this was a good get.

A VICE affiliate had nice things to say about one of my supercuts.

I was really pleased with the way this pet project came together for Cuteness.com. Even better: the subject himself seems to agree!

Modest buzz for recent posts about Patrick Stewart and his loveable foster dog...

...Kika, a service dog fixed with a GoPro to capture the daily commute of a sightless Londoner...

...and a foster kitten that went missing, only to be found sleeping in a box (OF COURSE!) of Kleenex.

There's a Hawaiian sanctuary home to 600 rescued cats? Of course I will take a 45-minute ferry ride to visit that!

Want content like the above for your site or brand? Bounce me a message!

New Work For Cuteness.com

Exciting news: For the last two months, I've been contributing at Cuteness.com, a community of animal lovers with a rapidly growing social footprint!

Owned and operated by Leaf Group (formerly Demand Media), the property was founded in 2008 "as a place for pet parents to show off their critters" but pivoted last year to a new focus on trending animal news, viral videos, tutorials, and BuzzFeed-style listicles.

I've enjoyed working with their editorial team to identify stories that align with the site's demographic (which skews millennial and female), frame and sharpen pitches, and write (at least somewhat) to the AP style, something I've never really had to do previously. 

Highlights thus far include: this piece about a Redditor that cut a window into his fence so his dog could see the neighboring doggo (pictured above, left), this gallery of Star Wars dogs, this brief about Obama emptying out the joke book when he pardoned his final Thanksgiving turkey (sigh ... ), and this one about a British couple that's been recreating classic movie moments with their kittehs! 

I'm also eager to signal-boost my newest post, Some Cats Are Bold, But This One Scaling A Rock Wall Is Boulder (also above, right), because, well, I can't resist turning a dumb pun.

UPDATE: This profile of director James Gunn (Guardians Of The Galaxy, Slither) was a pet project that came together in a fun and fresh way. Even better: the subject himself seems to agree!</humblebrag>

UPDATE #2: I've been added to the masthead as a "Contributing Writer"!

UPDATE #3: Recent assignments have been piling up "Likes" and "Shares" on Facebook. Embedded below are some examples!

Need a versatile generalist that can jump between styles and voices for your creative squad? Hit. Me. Up.

Looping Oregon's Only National Park On A Road Bike Is Hella Fun

The route at Crater Lake isn't particularly challenging but it doesn't come free: there's roughly 4,000 feet of climbing spread across the route's 33 miles! More snaps at my Facebook ...

COTTON CANDY FROM THE REEL WORLD: Watch A New Supercut Of The Greatest T-Shirts In Movie History

From airbrushed novelties and tacky tourist tees to raglan ringers and stupid slogans, film's most amazing — and ridiculous — prop tees take center stage in a new supercut, as stitched together from 103 total movies and along a messy multitude of shared and overlapping thematic threads. 

While I probably wouldn't describe the curatorial process as scientific, designs were included for the following attributes: Message, font, color, pattern, cut, rarity, comedic value, plot significance, visibility, screen time, how strongly they are associated with the character that wore them, and, hold onto your butts, ~~personal preference~~.

Because I'm not a garment Nazi, some tank tops, henleys, and hooded sweatshirts have been filtered into the mix. Fight me or something.

Below: a complete list of the designs, their source, and the time they appear!

1. “It’s a nice touch … “ // The Color Of Money (0:00)

2. Spring Break + Sun’s Out Guns Out // 22 Jump Street (0:05)

3. Waynestock // Wayne’s World 2 (0:06)

4. Camo + Airborne // The Lost Boys (0:08)

5. Wolf portrait // Napoleon Dynamite (0:09)

6. Yellow Lab // The Hangover Part II (0:10)

7. Team Rod // Hot Rod (0:12)

8. Vince // The Color Of Money (0:13)

9. Mac’s olive drab t-shirt // One Flew Over The Cuckoo’s Nest (0:16)

10. Tie-Dye Pot Leaf // Half Baked (0:17)

11. Chainsaw Kittens // Empire Records (0:18)

12. The Flintstones // The Terminator (0:19)

13. Willie Nelson tour shirt // Meatballs (0:20)

14. Team Zissou // The Life Aquatic With Steve Zissou (0:21)

15. Got Christ? // Clerks II (0:22)

16. Betty Jane Tavern // Wet Hot American Summer (0:23)

17. World’s Best Grandma // Paper Towns (0:25)

18. Blaster // Over The Top (0:27)

19. Superman // The Goonies (0:28)

20. I’ll Call Billy Zane // Zoolander 2 (0:31)

21. Sex Bob-Omb // Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World (0:33)     

22. Purple Teen Wolf // Teen Wolf (0:35)

23. Airbrushed Boobs // Running Scared (0:37)

24. Bed-Stuy // Do The Right Thing (0:38)

25. Yoda // Step Brothers (0:40)

26. Pabst Blue Ribbon // Old School (0:41)

27. White Cat With Rose // Hackers (0:42)

28. Calico Kitten // Chappie (0:43)

29. Cat Face // Spy (0:45)

30. Spray Paint Kittens // Batman Returns (0:46)

31. I Ate At The Dixie Boy // Maximum Overdrive (0:49)

32. Gumbo + I’m With Stupid // Big (0:51)

33. Sid’s Skull shirt // Toy Story (0:54)

34. I’m That Dude // Ride Along (0:56)

35. Amsterdam // Knocked Up (0:58)

36. Public Enemy + Employee Of The Month // The 40-Year-Old Virgin (0:59)

37. Super Jew // Funny People (1:00)

38. Take Yo Pants Off!!! // This Is The End (1:02)

39. Zombie Vs. Shark // This Is The End (1:03)

40. Color Combs // Hot Tub Time Machine (1:05)

41. What The Fett? // The Internship (1:06) 

42. All The Young Dudes // Clueless (1:07)

43. Rydell High School // Grease (1:09)

44. Mötley Crüe // Bull Durham (1:11)

45. Adams Atoms // Revenge Of The Nerds (1:12)

46. Beacon Town High School // Teen Wolf (1:14)

47. Your Guess Is As Good As Mine // GoldenEye (1:16)

48. Kaoru Betto // Cold Feet (1:17)

49. Kaoru Betto // The Fisher King (1:19)

50. Kaoru Betto // The Big Lebowski (1:20)

51. Flynn’s // Tron (1:21)

52. Soccer 6 // The Runaways (1:24)

53. Arnold Is Numero Uno // Pumping Iron (1:27)

54. Punk print + Purple Skeleton // The Terminator (1:29)

55. Beach Babe // Trainspotting (1:33)

56. First Mate + Eat The Rich // Summer School (1:35)

57. Chicago Cubs // National Lampoon’s Vacation (1:37)

58. Walley World // National Lampoon’s European Vacation (1:39)

59. Clifton + Camp Firewood // Wet Hot American Summer (1:40)

60. I Ate The Whole Thing // Foxes (1:43)  

61. I Hate Boys // It’s Kind Of A Funny Story (1:45)

62. Fuck You You Fucking Fuck // The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo (1:47)

63. Paris Je T’Aime // 10 Cloverfield Lane (1:48)

64. Okinawa, Japan // Kill Bill: Vol. 1 (1:48)

65. Blue ringer // Kids (1:50)

66. Pink Shells // Wet Hot American Summer (1:51)

67. Hot Lips // Sisters (1:53)

68. Evil Taco // Juno (1:55)

69. I’ve Been To Duluth // The Great Outdoors (1:57)

70. Purple Rain tour shirt // The Goonies (1:59)

71. Pizza Guy // Fast Times At Ridgemont High (2:00)

72. Señor Pizza // Loverboy (2:04)

73. People Like You // Charlie Bartlett (2:06)

74. I Hate Reboots // Kick-Ass 2 (2:08)

75. Mimic This // Edge Of Tomorrow (2:09)

76. Firebirds // Top Gun (2:10)

77. Strategic Scientific Reserve // Captain America: The First Avenger (2:12)

78. Daddy’s Lil Monster // Suicide Squad (2:15)

79. Tuxedo tee // Fast Times At Ridgemont High (2:17)

80. Musical Notes // Repo Man (2:18) 

81. Detroit Sucks // Almost Famous (2:20)

82. I See Dead Pixels // Forgetting Sarah Marshall (2:21)

83. Richard Pryor // Superbad (2:22)

84. Dancing Elk Condors // Juno (2:24)

85. Plumtree + Pixel Skull //  Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World (2:26)

86. Sharpie // Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World (2:31)

87. Astroboy // Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World (2:33)

88. Air Quotes // Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World (2:34)

89. Bass Guitar // Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World (2:35)

90. Dance Contest Winner // There’s Something About Mary (2:37)

91. I’m A Pepper // The Life Aquatic With Steve Zissou (2:40)

92. Black Sabbath // The Avengers (2:41)

93. DJ Bruce Lee // The Avengers: Age Of Ultron (2:43)

94. Mister Softee // Captain America: Civil War (2:44)

95. Bea Arthur // Deadpool (2:45)

96. Pastel Dolphins + Bananas // Mike And Dave Need Wedding Dates (2:47)

97. Delta Psi Beta // Neighbors (2:50)

98. Lambda Lambda Lambda // Revenge Of The Nerds (2:51)

99. Who Farted? // Revenge Of The Nerds II: Nerds In Paradise (2:52)   

100. Bullet Hole Smiley Face // Revenge Of The Nerds II: Nerds In Paradise (2:54)

101. Greasy Tony’s // Revenge Of The Nerds (2:56)

102. Makin Bacon // The Karate Kid (2:58)

103. Humping Armadillos // The Legend Of Billie Jean (2:59)

104. Walter’s Dude Ranch // UHF (3:01)

105. Space Invaders // E.T. The Extra-Terrestrial (3:03)

106. Aggressive Hockey // Slap Shot (3:05)

107. Charlestown Chiefs // Slap Shot (3:07)

108. Killer // Slap Shot (3:08)

109. Skull Tile // This Is Spinal Tap (3:10)

110. Gumby & Pokey // This Is Spinal Tap (3:12)

111. Flat Track Motorcycle // The Bad News Bears (1976) (3:13)

112. She Looked Good Last Night // The Bad News Bears (2005) (3:15)

113. God’s Gift To Women // Zapped (3:17)

114. Fight Club // Mr. & Mrs. Smith (3:18)

115. Black Sugar // Fight Club (3:19)

116. Motorcross // Fight Club (3:21)

117. Sock It To Me // Fight Club (3:22)

118. Mesh (!!!) Hustler // Fight Club (3:24)

119. Fuck This Court // The People Vs. Larry Flynt (3:26)

120. I’m Frigo, Kapeesh // Adventureland (3:28)          

121. Globo Gym // DodgeBall: A True Underdog Story (3:29)

122. Snake Plissken’s Zipper Tank // Escape From New York (3:31)

123. Chips Dips Chains And Whips // Weird Science (3:32)

124. I Survived The Sooper Dooper Looper // Ping Pong Summer (3:34)

125. Heaven // Roller Boogie (3:35)

126. Rides + Games // Adventureland (3:36)

127. Banksy’s Banana Bomb // Batman V Superman: Dawn of Justice (3:38) 

128. Who Writes This Stuff // Funny People (3:39)

129. White Teen Wolf // Teen Wolf (3:40)

130. Ghostbusters Logo // Ghostbusters (3:42)

131. Go Billie Jean // The Legend Of Billie Jean (3:44)

132. Jurassic Park // Jurassic World (3:46) 

 

Didn't see your favorite seen-on-screen t-shirt? It's probably in Part 1, which was edited in 2013 and received a modest amount of viral link love at the time of its release.

Concept, research, and editing by Travis Greenwood (spoiler alert: is me!) with some help from Robert Jones and Brett Roberts. Want a supercut of your own? I'm available for commissions!

This Painting Is A Goddamn Meowsterpiece

Parked myself in front of this epic spread by Austrian artist Carl Kahler (1855-1906)  for an hour last week and good god, I regret nothing!